I have made it through a large part of my life without even realising how much my eating was disordered and that it was a problem. It is difficult to pinpoint when it all started, but it got worse in my mid/late-twenties when my depression and anxiety were at its worst. The cycles of binge eating and restricting just grew more and more frequent and out of control. My weight started to increase, and this began to have more of an effect on my self-esteem and confidence.
No-one would know that I have any issues surrounding food, I eat “normally” around other people and there are no visible signs of an illness. It was my secret tool that I used when I needed to manage difficult feelings, emotions and situations. There is a lot of fear around accepting that I have an eating disorder and about other people’s views on what that looks like and whether I “fit the criteria”. I am coming to realise over time at these barriers should not stop me from seeking recovery.
Sweet Cavanagh has been my first step in understanding, accepting and getting help for my eating disorder. It is a safe space that where I can have conversations that I could not have anywhere else, with like-minded women who just give the most incredible support. Each week I learn something new that supports my journey to recovery.